I hate GMTV!

GMTV’s bit on Craig ‘Bo Selecta’ David was hilarious today! They did a quick video montage on his past with a voiceover stating that his first album was very successful and had ton’s of number ones, then mentioned his second album and his Sting collaboration then his third album and said nothing else about it! It was a shit album basically and didn’t do very well, and then they mentioned his new track and album.

Andrew ‘Pervert’ Marr kissed David’s butt and tried to be funny with him, and David’s dry non-existent wit came across in bucket loads. He also looked a bit porky not buff! He said he was going to do a few moves when he performed and looked more ‘Dad’ at a wedding than Justin ‘Timbo’ Timberlake.

Craig went on to say that he was really doing well money wise for his record company and that’s why he’s been allowed to sample songs and stuff from artists he really respects like David Bowie, Michael Jackson and Stevie Wonder! Oh I thought people usually comeback with sampled records because they were doing shit and needed the use of a record people loved that and would hopefully encourage them to buy the song.

Andrew Marr is like a peeping tom to all the female guests, he should either just gets his binoculars out for a good look or just dry hump the bitched legs! He says some of the worst flirty lines ever! And when Fiona told him Helen Mirren and Michelle ‘Pied’ Pheiffer (see what I did there) obviously had the hots for him a few weeks back he almost shot his bolt! I thought the tennis pervert has a wife? If she left him it’s pretty reasonable to guess why! And if he mentions sports once more during the television review I’ll die.

Christ and if you saw Fiona ‘The Peoples Princess’ Phillips last week and didn’t vomit at her shaking her talons with ‘poor village darkies’ and being all tearful (she couldn’t fucking cry if you stabbed the bitch) and poking her fucking sympathetic beak into their problems by wearing an expensive white shirt and jeans (ala’ Diana)I’d be very friggin surprised! Way to blend in with the locals Fiona, I liked it when you put your haggard old claw around the old woman and said she was like your Grandma, didn’t kiss the bitch though did you ya fuckin hypocrite!

GMTV gives me tumors!